Promises Kept

When our daughter was nine years old, a movie was released that she just had to see. “The Flintstones” was in theatres in the spring of 1994. Joe and I took Hannah to Roanoke, Virginia on his day off and we enjoyed popcorn, soft drinks, and family time watching the movie.

You know how it is when there’s a movie on HBO that you really, really like? I can watch the same one several times and not think a thing of it. Seeing “The Flintstones” once was plenty for me…but not for Hannah. A few days after our trip to Roanoke, she begged and begged to see it again. Joe told her they’d have a date night and go back for pizza and a movie.

The day before their big date came and she was getting excited. Then the phone rang…

Her daddy was a United Methodist minister, and if you know anything about that denomination you’ll know that there are lots and lots of meetings. Sometimes there are meetings to plan meetings! Joe was closest to the telephone while we were eating dinner, so he picked it up. You could tell from his side of the conversation that a specially called meeting had been set for the next evening. The chairman of the Finance Committee was calling to insure Joe would be there.

I saw Hannah’s face change as the conversation wore on. Her little eyes looked down as if she’d cry…but she didn’t. She was used to her daddy having to spend evenings now and again at the church. I watched her as Joe wrote down the time and place of the meeting. Her date night had been spoiled. I hurt for her because her daddy was very good at making time to spend with her on a regular basis. But this was the Finance Committee! Any preacher knows you don’t miss one of those!

Then he told the voice on the phone that they’d have to conduct the meeting without him. He had a previous engagement that couldn’t be broken.

She was his “previous engagement” and she knew it! When she heard those words Hannah’s eyes lit up! And a smile so big it could’ve lit up the room came across her face! Once again, Daddy kept his promise to her.

That’s his habit. If he gives you his word about something…even “The Flintstones” movie…he’ll keep it. I’ve grown accustomed to this in the 44 years we’ve been married.

When I was a kid, I remember times when my dad’s churches would take up so much of his time that he’d be eating dinner at 9 or 10:00 at night. When he first started as a pastor, he had five churches! Five! When we moved to a place that only had two churches, we thought we had arrived! Ha! But meetings, hospital visits and the like kept him pretty tied up. I’m not criticizing his dedication. His devotion to his ministry and his family were inspiring. But when you’re a kid, there are things that stick out in your mind.

When I was 14, my dad promised that he’d take me shopping to buy a dark skirt for a choral concert at school. My sister was in that chorus, too, and we had one dark skirt between us. I was growing taller and needed a new one. Dad told me what day we’d go after school and he’d take me to Wilsons (my favorite hamburger place) for supper after shopping.

The day came and Dad called the house to tell us that he’d be at the hospital all evening because a church member and their family needed him. No shopping. My heart sank. At the age of 14, I couldn’t understand why he’d need to spend an entire evening with church members!

Now, after being a pastor’s wife for all these years, I appreciate so much more why my dad did what he did. It’s the ministry. It was necessary! He was needed. That was his job and calling!

But what I saw Joe do for our little girl that night in 1994 has stuck in my mind all these years. I can still see the look on her face when she heard about his “previous engagement” and the delight she took in her daddy at that very moment!

Joe has been dedicated to his ministry for 46 years. He has been extremely effective every place he’s been appointed by the UMC. He's guided churches through building projects and renovations. Every church he's ever served has grown! I’m very proud of the pastor he’s been and the man he is. His love for Christ and His church is obvious. But in all that dedication, one thing he’s always done is family first! Over all these years, I’ve come to realize that not every pastor knows how to balance home and church. Joe does.

What you see is what I get! Joe is the same no matter what. He’s happy, dedicated, and a man who totally loves Jesus…and totally loves his wife and his family. Not every pastor’s spouse has this balance, but I can say with certainty that I do!

Now that he’s retired, we don’t know what God has in store for us, but we’ll be waiting to see. Meanwhile, there’s joy in the journey. Part of that joy comes from living with a man who keeps his promises. I am blessed.

i love you, Joe…



(I got my skirt, by the way. That night I dug around in my mother’s sewing patterns, pulled out some dark brown fabric, read the directions and sewed my own skirt on a sewing machine no one in our house had ever used!!! I’d never sewn before! A temper tantrum turned into a lifelong love of sewing!)



If you have a pulse, you have a purpose…so make your life count!